Things have been heating up on the homefront recently and I sure as hell can feel the heat from here (‘here’ being New Zealand the ‘homefront’ being Portland, OR). See, Portland’s beloved culture perpetuators, Tender Loving Empire, is about to grow up. They’ve recently gotten ahold of a new space into which they plan to move their headquarters. The new space, I’m told, is far larger and allows for much more physical growth as well as productive growth. There will be a new gallery space, a place for live performances, all the goodies of the old NW shop, and more smiles than you can fit in a school bus. Actually, the changes are insurmountable and will surely aid the inevitable world domination for which TLE has plans.

This is a shot of the new storefront located right in Portland’s sweet spot, 412 SW 10th Avenue, super close to Powell’s and all that downtowny goodness. I love the design on this poster.

The above video features all the artists who’re contributing to the murals that will appear on the interior of the new space. There is so much talent gushing out of this video and onto the walls… can’t wait til it’s done.

And lastly here’s a flyer I just made showcase the 3rd annual TLE birthday party. This show, in the past, has consistently been one of the best shows of the each year since it’s inception. For those of you around, be sure to check it out and celebrate how far this tiny operation has come.

Keep an eye out for TLE in the coming years, dudes. We’re gonna be huge.

In New Zealand, apple picking season begins in late February. Amongst the employed are locals, seasoned veterans, and transient travelers. I fall into the latter category. It is truly the ideal job for a peripatetic soul such as myself; temporary work, not too laborious, lucrative, and in many respects, fun.

This is how my day usually looks.

This is how I will look when I’m 46.

My day starts just before sunrise. This was an early morning rainbow I woke up to a few days ago. I have been staying in a shed that is owned by my orchard, Tyrella Orchards.

Now, the shed situation may sound grim, but it’s actually quite nice. It’s a converted storage shed fit with couches, a full kitchen, showers and the lot. It’s a bit breezy do to the lack of any sort of insulation but I’m far from complaining. Usually I take the van to the pick site but if I’m up to it I’ll ride my bike depending on the distance. The orchard owns about 6 – 7 pick sites, or “blocks”.

There is an art to picking apples as there is for most things. At first I sucked really hard at it but I’ve gotten much better and faster. One must be careful not to bruise or damage the apple. It is also of high importance that the apple be in good color. Often times only half the fruit on the trees will be properly ripened.

The work is contractually based and pickers are paid by bin. A bin is a huge wooden container (seen in the above animation) that contains generally about 2500 apples, or 400 kilograms worth. On a good day I’ll pick 6 bins. My best day was 8 bins. So, on average, it’s safe to say I’m picking roughly 1300 apples daily. The season lasts about 9 weeks. Do the math. In the end I’ll have picked about 1,000,000 apples, no lie.

Ongoing giant apple contest.

My orchard ships most of it’s fruit to the UK but also has a contract with trendy US grocer, Trader Joe’s. We sell them dehydrated apple slices for use in their name brand product of a similar variety. So go out and buy summadem chips and chances are I will have graced the same molecular space as said snack.

I will hold this job for the next few weeks until the pickin’ ain’t good no more. All in all it’s good work. I’m outside all day listening to music with no one bothering me. Often I’ll chuck on some sciencey podcasts to keep the ol’ wheels greased but other than that it’s daydreaming central. I moslty love it because It’d the exact opposite of the service industry; I’m working only for myself. I start when it’s most convenient, take much lunch when I want for as long as I want, and go home when I’m tired… the way all jobs should be in my opinion. I’m saving up for a multitude of plane tickets that will take me the rest of the way around the world in the coming months.

Feel free to pose any apple-related questions. I’m quite well versed now.

Much love,

Andrew